your room smells of hookers.
And success
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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