I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
