omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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