Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize