I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
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