if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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