:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
