so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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