its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize