I look better un-naked...
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
No subtext here. People are naked.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
