i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
