oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
