i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
i now understand why vodka
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
