No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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