4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
