Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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