if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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