she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
