so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
