Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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