your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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