Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
