Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize
