But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
