Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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