you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
