remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
This baby is an asshole
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Randomize