I love black thongs
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
