when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
