Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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