He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
