I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
