I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
