Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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