Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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