I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
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