his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
