somebody snuck up and got me drunk
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
