It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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