he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
