We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
