well I can't set my house on fire every night
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
