i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I have post one night stand depression
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