I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
