How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
The beer is more important than you right now.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
