you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
