I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
