I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
