Kareoke will never be a sober sport
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
