I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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